College Football!

'Twas a historic Saturday for college football... and a very good day as far as Mom and Dad are concerned!

1.  The OU Sooners lost to Michigan (unexpected)

2.  The Texas Longhorns beat Ohio State with a literally last-minute touchdown
3.  The OSU Cowboys defeated the #6-ranked Oregon Ducks in Stillwater (with fans storming the field at the end of OSU's first home game with their new coach)!

Thanks to Melanie and Sophie's podcast, along with Brene Brown and Adam Grant's podcast, plus years of Mom and Dad being major sports fans, I know more about the college football world than most people would expect. lol  And still, I'm mostly in it for the food, company, and photos on these OSU Club-level tickets!

Chet and Tate joined me for this one.  It was slated to be an 11AM game, then there was a rain delay that pushed the kickoff back to 12:30.  Lame, but it did allow us to stop at the University Store, where I grabbed an OSU t-shirt, earrings, and sunglasses, and Tate grabbed a foam finger! lol

This = us making a quick trip across Boone Pickens Stadium to see Bill and bring him some popcorn and an ice cream bar!  (Tate didn't love the loud fireworks as the game was getting started, but he still smiled for my photo, which I always appreciate!)

This was a really nice break from my month+ of nursing and caregiving.  I listened to a fantastic audiobook on my drive there and back, then we cheered on the Cowboys, and Chet and I had an important convo that helped me prepare for another important convo once we finally got our seats to watch the game.  They were serving brisket, pulled pork, nachos, salad, white cheddar mac n' cheese, shrimp and grits, hot dogs, chili, biscuits and gravy, crispy bacon, fresh fruit, waffles, cheesy hashbrown casserole, etc., along with assorted cookies, candy, and ice cream bars!  Even though the rain delay made getting a table impossible for us in the beginning, I'm a big fan of the 11AM games for the brunchy food combo!!

Selfie by Chettles

Group pic on our way out by the fun OSU letters!

North Club level view from inside - we got a bar-table seat overlooking the field, which was perfect for chatting without too much noise (or heat or humidity) but still seeing and feeling a part of the game!  ...It also helps that Chet and I would both choose good conversation over football 95% of the time. lol

Tate was excited to run on the Sherman E. Smith practice field (right across from the North Club Level suites).

We left in the middle of the 3rd Quarter - the Wilsons needed to get home, and the 1.5-hour delay didn't really help with that.  I was happy to see that the Cowboys pulled off the win - a much better way to start this new season than the random loss in Tulsa last week.

And in non-college-football-related news, tomorrow, this preshface will be six months old, so Happy Half-Birthday to Miss Paige Evelyn!! ❤

❤ ❤ ❤

Failure that Needs Forgiveness

 Happy Labor Day, friends and fam!  I hope you get to relax a bit and enjoy some time off!!

Two things that have been helpful to me lately on a soulful/spiritual level:

We may not have this in common, but when anyone hurts me, it is my very strong tendency to try to assume good intent in the other person, reminding myself of their good qualities, thinking about what they might be going through, how they might be having a hard day or have endured childhood pain I cannot understand or be processing life through a different lens, etc.  I would argue that it's valid and wise to remember that no one but Christ is perfect, and we are all flawed human beings who will hurt each other occasionally (and often unintentionally).  But sometimes in the midst of all that, I end up minimizing my own hurt and bypassing my own need for healing.

The idea that everyone is doing the best they can does not ring true for me or align with Scripture.  And I really loved the reminder from John Eldredge last week that our hurts and disappointments matter to God and should not be minimized or glossed over.  Especially with major betrayals or deeper childhood wounds, we need to view those events (or hurtful words or actions) as a FAILURE that needs to be FORGIVEN rather than an inadequacy that needs to be excused in the person who hurt us.  Yes, please to that truth bomb!  ...Trying to make excuses for things that were devastating and damaging is unhealthy, and ironically, it blocks our ability to see it clearly and forgive and move forward well.  Whatever else was behind it, there are multiple people who have failed to love me well, to see and hear me when I needed them, to show up and help out when it was within their power to do so... and I want to stop minimizing that failure.  We can have Christlike mercy and empathy toward others, but "you can only forgive someone genuinely once you name what you are forgiving."

Yes, John Eldredge, and thanks again!❤

Secondly, Psalm 147:3 says: "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds."

That verse has come to mind repeatedly as I am the makeshift wound-care nurse for Mom this month.  When I used to hear it, I would picture something more like a large Bandaid binding a minor cut.  This gives me a new context for it that feels more accurate and powerful.

The current wound on Mom's left leg is large - jarring for anyone the first time they see the graphic photos or see it in person.  (I won't post those pictures here, but it was an open oval-shaped wound, similar in size and appearance to a pound of raw ground hamburger meat.)  Now that her second surgery is completed, the wound care process has begun - we are cleaning it daily to prevent infection, gently washing, rinsing, and drying it, then carefully covering it with xeroform (a sterile, non-adhesive dressing soaked in petroleum jelly), cushioning it for comfort, wrapping all of that with layers of gauze, and securing the wrapped covering with an elastic-like burn net.  It is an ongoing and meticulous daily process that requires attentive care on a larger wound that will take months to fully heal -- which all feels like a far more accurate picture of what Jesus does for us when He heals our broken hearts and binds up our wounded souls.  And the truth of that image is comforting to me.

In summary (me talking to myself here):

Your heart matters,

And God is not indifferent to your wounds.

Acknowledge the places where others have failed you,

and then pray through forgiving them...

Trust Jesus to bind even the biggest, most raw and sharply painful wounds.

He is an expert on healing and restoration.

He is with you and for you.

He allows nothing without purpose,

And He cares enough to join you in the daily process of healing.

He will be patient and gradually renew your strength.

Take heart; the best is yet to come!

❤ ❤ ❤

Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness

Happy Tuesday, blog-reading friends!  I'm writing from Mom's room in the Burn & Wound Care Unit of the hospital, my home for this current work week!

I brought her here last Friday for her fourth (and FINAL) wound-vac change, and the PA quickly talked us into coming back on Monday for a skin graft surgery procedure - they said she could stay five days for better pain management, and it has absolutely been helpful so far!  It's not perfect, but we are very grateful for getting into the system here... for Dr. Lentz and Taylor (who did the surgery), and caring nurses Rose, Demarco, Stuart, Matt, and Jennifer!

This = Mom and I before her appointment Friday 

Fare thee well, wound-vac.  We shan't miss you! lol

(Really, I'm grateful it kept her healthy and infection-free.  But it made a consistent suction noise similar to snoring, and there were issues with leaks where the machine would beep at us and I'd have to try to put more tape over her wound to stop the air-leak hissing sound - most often between 3 and 5am.)

Thank you notes...

Adding Brandon and Whitney to the list - he called to check in on Mom, then they stopped by and brought flowers the next day

And Kim Love - she and Kenny made a surprise visit on Sunday bringing dinner and a variety pack of cookies! 

I was up past 2AM finishing my transcript on Sunday - partly my own fault because I had to come watch the last 30 minutes of A Few Good Men when I saw that it was on... such a fantastic movie!!

Roses from Brandon & Whitney

Transcript time - with approximately 500,000 important breaks over the past week. lol  But I got it done and filed in ALL TWENTY case numbers on Monday morning!!!

I spent Saturday morning and afternoon touring OKC and Edmond apartments with T-man!

We saw some good ones, including The Oak OKC and the Parc at Kelly Pointe

❤

I love blue in a kitchen... I'm a fan!

We stopped for a fun lunch at Shake Shack in OKC - new to me, and I'm super-thrilled about it!  

(Good shakes, burgers, chicken sandwiches, mac n' cheese, and fries with NYC travel vibes!)

This one was downtown called The Bower.  He ended up going with a fantastic apartment near Nichols Hills!  I co-signed the lease, and he is moving in on FRIDAY!!  I was excited when I realized that was 8-28 (as in Romans 8:28 "All things work together for good").

AFD and JW got married on August 21st - CONGRATS to them!

All the posts about this event made me happy!

Megan Elizabeth is pregnant with her first baby boy - this = her and Tim with her niece, Afton, at the gender reveal party!!

Natalie and Walker had an awesome trip to South Carolina - praying for continued healing and peace in their lives!

This = me hosting Zoom court yesterday and this morning in hospital waiting rooms... yay for doing whatever it takes, and yay for the Integris hospital WiFi working for me!

Mom and I watching K's volleyball game this afternoon - another CHA victory!

Yay for Rach setting up these videos for us - Mom is such a fan and would hate to miss a moment!

Miss K serving it up!

Random ceiling tile in Mom's hospital room (the rest are plain) - I'm curious about the story behind it.

The Parrishes brought Shake Shack to-go for Mom and I tonight ❤

Midway through two weeks of experiencing the ins and outs of two very different hospital systems, I have lots of thoughts churning about the importance of leadership, genuine care, and service, particularly in the healthcare arena.  

Related:  I have a meeting set with Dr. Burkhart tomorrow to help solidify my decision, but I am praying about moving into a new degree path with the Doctorate in Strategic Leadership at Liberty University (only because it is not offered at CCU yet).  My interests have gradually shifted more and more in that direction over the past few years, so I am praying for wisdom and God-ordained exciting and meaningful leadership opportunities!!

I am grateful this week for the doors God is opening and closing, for the big and little ways He is showing up.  Grateful for every friend, family member, and medical professional who cares enough to act on it.  Grateful to be needed and helpful for Mom, and happy to feel like I'm learning valuable things as I observe everything here.  Trusting in God's new-every-morning grace and mercy, giving me exactly what I need to get through day by day.  I'm grateful that my nervous system is gradually returning to a place of peace and a sound mind... and that Mom's body is stabilizing and making substantial healing progress with well-controlled pain (especially comparing it to the excruciating pain of her 2011 skin graft).  

For the most part, this hospital room is much quieter without constant monitors going off or the wound vac noise.  However, we are in the Burn & Wound Care center, and occasionally, we've heard the groanings of burn victims enduring painful medical care - which was very heavy and really upsetting for Mom this morning.  We both need permeating God-given peace and rest - mind, body, soul, and spirit - God is providing those things for us, along with regular reminders to pray and seek Him!  I am grateful for the slow down, while also feeling grateful for the reminders (Annie's wedding, Megan's pregnancy, Triston's move) that life goes on and there are better seasons and happier times ahead, (starting with Mom being able to attend football and volleyball games that bring her so much joy).  Between mentally decorating Chet's new living room shelves for Christmas and furnishing Triston's new apartment, Mom has had an easier time keeping her mind off of the pain.  I'm grateful she had an excellent doctor and that God is bringing life and healing in Mom's body, something we've prayed for together several times these past couple weeks.  Grateful for seasons of rest and recovery that lead us into renewed strength.  Grateful for simple things that make life rich and vibrant, for a new open door for the Leadership PhD at Liberty, and for the ongoing pursuit of happiness, peace, and purpose!!
❤ ❤ ❤

Sunday Refresh

You know the scene from the first Inside Out where Joy draws a circle around Sadness and tells her to stay put, then Riley struggles silently trying to hold it together and keep every emotion under control... then when Joy finally lets Sadness have the controls for a minute (causing Riley to feel everything and cry), Riley finally receives the support she needs and is able to feel real joy in that too!?  

This weekend has been a lot like that.

When I accidentally made a 4AM phone call to a random woman while researching and trying to get info about the Silverstein Burn Center for Mom's treatment, I knew I was not quite okay.  I decided to entrust Mom to God and Dad for that morning and go to LifeGroup -- (she actually got sick and threw up, but everyone survived and nothing catastrophic went wrong).  After finally letting myself feel everything from the past week and crying pretty hard on the phone call with Chet (a trusted friend who listened well and responded with decisive compassionate action), I immediately felt better and more aware that I needed to be taking better care of myself.  Talking with the LG girls immediately after that was helpful and encouraging.  I went home and grabbed some workout clothes before heading back to Mom and Dad's for the night - I took a short walk/jog and listened to some music for the first time in a long while - both really nice and cathartic, even in the crazy summer heat.  Movement is medicine. =)  I texted with Tiffany and Kristin and took Kristin up on her offer to bring me a Coke icee (yum!) - it was good to see her and the boys for a minute, even though I failed to get a photo with them!  I had a good conversation with Mom about all of this, took some time to blog (always a processing outlet), and slept a bit more than usual this morning.  I enlisted Kristie's support (Mom's nurse friend who is coming to be with her tomorrow); and Rach talked with a CHA mom who has connections with the Integris Burn Center, and we all feel hopeful about that for better pain management for Mom moving forward - (prayers appreciated).

And last but never least, Chet Lee and Karli Marie made the trip from Tulsa to come see us!!  This pic = us at the Agua Fresca stand in Midwest City.  It brings me lots of joy that the guy posed with us! ❤

My walk/jog and Mom and Dad's old house

Ashley with the neck fan sneaking some pics at LifeGroup!  I really do own other shirts, but this was the main nicer shirt that I brought to Mom and Dad's, so it's in loads of photos from the past 3 days.  Alaska already feels very long ago.

Making vegetable beef soup in Mom's crockpot for our dinner tonight!  They also brought everything to make ahead and freeze easy meals for sheet-pan chicken fajitas and beef tacos!  It was good for my soul to see them and hang out and smell good food cooking in the kitchen...

Tate and Parker stayed with Bill and Melissa (how adorable are they in this pic!?)

But Miss Paige Evelyn made the trip with her parents! =)

Chet was excited about seeing the Agua Fresca stand on their way in, so we made a short trip to visit them (Karli got strawberries & cream; I got pineapple; Chet got pineapple and coconut).  Rachael was at the house watching Paige, and she and Dad were both there to help Mom if needed.  It was a short drive, but very refreshing!

On our way there, we drove by 9121 so I could show them the house where I grew up (& rant about just how badly the people who moved in after us ruined that house and yard). lol  And on our way back, we stopped for them to see Dad's office, which Chet said had an old school vibe that was great and very fitting for Dad!

The bluest eyes. ❤

Mom on a short walk getting a pic with the Wilsons!

Paige looking tired; me feeling that with her!

Tman stopping by to see Mom and catch up with Chet and Karli!

Some leftover bday cake to celebrate Kyndal Faith! lol

The Wilsons and the bedazzled Wilson basketball!  Simple things like this bring me stupid amounts of joy! =)

It was really good to see them and feel supported with some healthier and higher protein homemade meal options for Mom as she recovers!

Rach stopped by with J&K after their weekend at Josh's, and Tman and Carter stopped by around the same time (7:30ish) before grabbing dinner together... I know it made Mom happy to see them all together having fun.  She mentioned somewhere in there that she felt better than she had all week.  I felt the same way getting to catch up with Kristin and the Wilsons for a bit - just a sense of normalcy and support and joy in the midst of a heavy and chaotic week.

The fam again - must change shirts ASAP. lol

Flowers Carter Lee brought for Mamaw!

Kyndal somehow beat all 3 of her older brothers playing basketball, and it was definitely talked about for a few minutes amongst the siblings.  I made this collage for FB...

Kyndal:  "OMG yes, that's the best post EVER!  Two boys crying, one boy jealous, and one girl happy and victorious!" lolol  She's hilarious and fun and admirably confident, and I just love it!

So in closing on this memorable week where I've had so much to process and write about, three cheers for authenticity!  Let yourself feel what you need to feel and talk/write about it... and let other people support you!! 

Make the calls when you need some extra support and connection - maybe the other person will get a lot out of it too!

Praying for a more peaceful week ahead - goodnight!!

❤ ❤ ❤