Don't Let That Hold You Back

*This = Post #500 on this Season 2 Blog!
Four of my favorite Christian female authors released a new book on Tuesday!!

I pre-ordered 3 out of 4, and I'll grab Lysa's soon too.  (I wanted these on my bookshelf, but I'll for sure listen to the Audible version.)

Yaaaay - thanks to Kristin for this reminder today!!

I'm preparing and planning for a job interview tomorrow morning, and this encouragement was well-timed - thanks, God!

I'm especially excited to read this one by my good friend, Annie F. Downs (who I've only met twice in person and who I'm guessing is now legally Annie Jaeger, which brings me lots of joy).  I also love that she got colorful shoes and nails to match her book cover - fun!

I've read the first two chapters thanks to the pre-order bonuses, and the message of this book feels like God's good and perfect timing for me...

Fun Fact:  One year and three days ago, I was in NYC watching Hamilton live on Broadway!  (A truly fantastic solo trip - and it gave me the courage to book the solo Alaska cruise.)  Yes, please, to knocking those fantastic experiences off my Life List!! =)

Two days later, I had the Dallas IVF appointment where I learned about the fibroids that eventually led to me letting go of the embryo adoption plan.  I've got to say, the enemy knows how to target overthinkers (and it's so easy to believe lies when we are vulnerable and hurting) -- my ability to reframe things can be a great blessing or a curse, and it is VITAL that I take my thoughts captive and submit to God's leadership, truth, and grace!

I'm thankful for good friends who could help me separate the light from the dark and see things more clearly when the path ahead felt foggy and scary.

I pressed the pause button on almost everything in that season, convincing myself that I had gotten the adoption pursuit very wrong and it was better for me to step back until I knew for sure that God was with me and for me in whatever I was stepping into...

But the truth is, I did a lot of things right in that season.  It was right and good for me to pray over that dream, step out in faith, put my best foot forward, trust God's goodness, and pursue motherhood wholeheartedly.  AND it was right and good for me to recognize the doors being closed, pray for wisdom, and learn to accept and surrender to God's leading in a new way.  Hard.  But not wrong; not missing God; not stupid, inadequate, or selfish.  God wasn't mad at me or disappointed in me over any of that, and I don't want to allow the enemy to steal or kill or destroy the good things God did in me and for me through that season.

God did not fail or abandon me then, and He will not fail or abandon me now.  Even today, I have to trust Him and be willing to step out with bold faith in pursuing new dreams, while also being willing to surrender to His leading even when it is hard or costly!!

I feel like I'm getting the chance to do both of those here lately as I step back into the CCU PhD pursuit.  It feels equal parts daunting and exciting in this moment - I've spent the better part of a year convincing myself that I'm not cut out for the counseling world and don't really belong there, but God has spoken so clearly lately that I cannot (and would never want to) ignore or dismiss it.  Praying for more of God's power and grace as I step toward His calling and purpose for me - which involves sticking with some things I would rather leave, and letting go of some things I'd rather cling tightly to!!

All that to say, I don't want to let anything hold me back from following God boldly, and I think Annie's book will be really encouraging on that front!

❤

Shifting gears, it made me (and Kyndal Faith) happy that Coach Nikki (the solid leader of the Rise Club VB organization) used her pic on the Instagram invite for club tryouts!!

"Do not be afraid as you go out to fight... Do not lose heart or panic or tremble before them.  For the Lord your God is going with you!  HE will fight for you against your enemies, and He will give you victory!"  YES, Deuteronomy - love this book!!  God is with us and bringing us victory over the enemy, but we still have an active role to play by going out to fight for the full life God wants to give us - I feel that as deeply as I've ever felt it in this season!

HBD to Kate on Tuesday (when I started this post - lol).  

Thankful for her example of resilient joy and for her friendship through the years!!

Okay friends, I am off to sleep in my very own bed for the first time since August 6th - exciting times!!

Very grateful that Mom is improving, and we decided it was better for me to start the day here for the morning interview.  Praying for good momentum, that God will open the right doors as I move forward with integrity and faith.

❤ ❤ ❤

Thankful Thursday #243

"He who started a good work in you
will be faithful to carry it to completion."
~Philippians 1:6

Today, I am thankful for:

1.  God parting the Red Sea (making a way where the path felt blocked), giving me more clarity, and opening new-but-still-scary doors for me - I am now officially a Colorado LPC Candidate with the ability to potentially counsel CO clients remotely and earn my hours with a more trusted and CCU-aligned supervisor... took their online CO Jurisprudence exam late Tuesday and got approved Wednesday afternoon.  I really cannot begin to tell you how simplified that process felt compared to the painful hoops I had to jump through to get started in Oklahoma.  The doors here have been very stubborn, and the doors in Colorado seem to open quickly for all things counseling-related.  Doing my best to trust God and keep moving forward with wisdom and grace!!  (I wanted this to be a gif with doors sliding open as she walks forward, but alas, ChatGPT would not cooperate. lol)

2. Not quite the type of book I dream of writing down the road, but still fun getting to see my name in print as a chapter co-author for this new textbook (led by Dr. Philip, Director of the CCU PhD program, and among the most Godly women I have the privilege of knowing).  

3.  Joining Dr. Shade Zahrai's "Self Leadership Academy" - I loved her Big Trust book and have come to trust her for solid content, so I'm hoping this will have a Launch-level impact for me!!

4.  Kyndal Faith's love of noodles and corn... and her sense of humor saying "they grow up so fast" when I make presh collages like this one! lol

5.  Jill Lemeiux, who celebrated her 70th Birthday on Tuesday!!  Thankful for their friendship and hope she had a wonderful day!  (Below = a gift Bill hired Rach to make for her from Paris, her all-time favorite dog! lol)

6.  The Jaegers - it's so fun to see Annie loving life as a married woman in this new season!!

7.  Getting to see T-man's new apartment with Mom and help with rearranging his furniture a bit and ordering a few new things!

Also thankful for fun lunch plans with Kristin Michelle this afternoon... I've barely seen her since Mom's wreck, so we have loads to catch up on! (We were planning to hang out and have dinner on August 7th, ironically - she was one of my first calls after finding out about the wreck).  

Anyway, that's all for now.  Happy Thursday!

❤ ❤ ❤

Life Lately...

Hey, friends and family!  Hope you're having a delightful weekend so far. ❤

This = me and Kristin walking toward each other from opposite sides of The Station on Wednesday. lol

It felt like a dramatic movie moment.  Their parking lot is so full (thanks to the pool being open this month) that we had to park on opposite sides of the lake.  Once we met in the middle, we had a lovely Wednesday walk and talk! =)

This = Tman heading into Holly's apartment for part two of his time in Colorado.  I came back home so I wouldn't miss too many workdays, but he stayed at her place (while she was in Vegas from Monday to Thursday) and explored more of Colorado.  He was able to meet with two of the mentors from Holly's company, another engineer friend of hers, and his favorite former teacher from CHA (who moved to CO a couple years back).  He also got to explore Breckenridge, brainstorm new business ideas, take the train to Boulder, walk around Cherry Creek, buy some groceries at Trader Joe's, and experience being in the apartment on his own for a few days.  I picked him up at the airport on Thursday night, and it was uplifting to hear how well things had gone for him!

The Mini Miss K is making this awesome gift for her best friend, Ellery!

I love her creativity and attention to detail, and the thoughtful effort she's putting in for her friend!

A screen background that made me happy when my computer rebooted.  I love this whole office room, honestly!  A cozy home workspace I don't wanna be forced to leave any time soon. lol

AFD and JW - all of her wedding planning posts are fun to read lately!

K-Faith is the best. lol  Huzzah for winning this trivia game... Dad was watching Jace play basketball, so only Mom and I played.  We both knew most of the answers, but I was faster to click the right button on my phone. lol

The KiwiCo gift subscription I got Tate for his 8th bday was a solid choice... this is the archery kit he built - Karli said it's been a hit with both kids, so I'm thrilled to hear that!  And on the right is preshface Parker being adorable with her mermaid Barbie.  (The Petite Princess subscription I got for her has been less than stellar so far - I need them to step it up and be more timely, as the thought of her running to the mailbox excited then coming back emptyhanded is the very saddest!)

Yay, new flowers (planted by Bobby) in my mini-flowerbed!

Speaking of flowers, in a surprising move, Rachael planted some flowers in her front yard her very own self, then she had an entertaining convo with ChattyG (as she calls it) about how they were doing.  This screenshot made Triston and I pretty happy! lolol  (And yes, I acknowledge it's a little creepy that it's telling her it "feels invested" and asking for more pics and saying they'll get through it together if the flowers die - the degree to which it is trained to act as a friend/therapist is pretty fascinating.)

Precious Tom Holland... playing the oldest brother in The Impossible (the tsunami movie), then today.  He and Glen Powell are my top two actors at the moment - I find Tom incredibly endearing.  His podcast interview with Amy Poehler was great... he talked about being severely dyslexic and having never hosted SNL because he tends to freeze when he has to read something aloud and worries about how he would handle the cue cards.  He always tries to memorize his lines for script read-throughs.  It just made me like him even more (as if Spider-Man and this epic performance weren't enough).

In other news, I hosted the Heal Out Loud women's LifeGroup for the second time yesterday.  We had an in-depth discussion of Psalm 139, then Katie shared her story with us.  Here's me, Haley, Natalie and Walker, Ashley, Josie, and Katie - thankful for this group and for the opportunity to host and lead this summer - it's been good for me in lots of ways!

Yesterday was also Mom and Dad's 45th Anniversary!!
Pics = her cooking and him washing dishes at a recent family dinner - (the only candid I threw in, but I'm grateful for their kindness and hospitality and they way they help/serve each other), 2013 anniversary dinner, after Grandad's graveside service 2019, their wedding day 1981, family dinner for T's graduation celebration, Mom's 70th birthday, their 40th Anniversary at Charleston's, Thanksgiving dinner at Justin's, and the ferry ride on our NYC trip!

❤

A CCU friend who is turning 30 this month had a dramatically-themed party that included cookies mourning her youth and a scavenger hunt at a real local cemetery (where I sincerely hope they planned the timing extra carefully).

*This is one of the most playful people I know, so I'm certain it was well-intended and a joyful time with her friends, and I sincerely hope her decade milestone bday ahead is fantastic!!

...Maybe it's because I've experienced intense grief along with genuine suicidality several years back, but I typically cannot get on board with jokes about death - even the skull memes and "I died" laughing trend is *not* a fit for me.  I have learned that our words have a spiritual and physical impact, "the power of life and death" as God put it -  and we can choose to speak life and hope and renewal, trusting that we can embody youthful energy, be kind to our inner child, and create fun memories with the people we love right up until God takes us to Heaven, where those things will literally never die again!!

On a related note, when I finish this blog, I will be writing a card for Kristen's parents, as the one-year anniversary of her death is fast approaching.  The front of the card is this verse:  "There are in the end three things that last: faith, hope, and love, and the greatest of these is love." ~1 Cor. 13:13
I am very grateful that Christ-centered faith, hope, and love never die. ❤

The fam (+ Ellery) after our dinner at BJ's last night! ❤

My Biscoff pizookie - shared with Mom and Rach and it was still unfinished, but yum!

I've watched a couple of the MasterClass videos from Shade Zahrai lately (pronounced Shaw-day, and writing it that way just made me think of Usher. lol)  She authored the Big Trust book on overcoming self-doubt that I loved.  In one of her classes, she talked about how she wasn't sure getting her PhD was worth the effort, and how there is great value in "the applied practitioner approach" (distilling complex academic research and presenting the information in a way that helps laypeople understand the core concepts and learn something valuable).  Mel Robbins, Brene Brown, Vanessa Van Edwards, and Beth Moore all do this well, and in every case, that is soooo much closer to what I want for my future than writing and publishing textbooks or rigorous academic papers full of terms most people would not understand or connect with.  I'm after heart connection that leads to Kingdom impact!

So I'm very grateful to Allen Levi for his rules of writing that sparked a lot of this thought process, and to Shade for that insight that allowed me to put clear language to something I've been feeling/thinking for a while now.  It's all starting to come together internally, and I've created a plan to write a solid book draft (not a memoir, but an accessible book that will incorporate pieces of my story along with Biblical truth and evidence-based research on learned helplessness, personal agency, and post-traumatic growth - yes, puh-lease!) I have a working title and clear chapter ideas and everything - yay!!  More on that as I move forward.  (I could absolutely sift through the research and write this book right now, but there is a sincere question/curiosity in my mind about whether the LPC and PhD would make my writing feel more credible here, so I may set up a meeting with Dr. Burkhart to discuss all of the above now that I'm beginning to see the end-goal and my desired reading audience more clearly, which all feels exciting and hopeful.)

Okay then!  Happy Sunday, Happy Flag Day, and Happy Bday to JMM! lol #neverforget  I hope it's a wonderful day and week ahead for you!!

❤ ❤ ❤

Audiobook Club

I've made my way through nine audiobooks over the past two months, all of which I really enjoyed!  It was four personal memoirs, three fictional novels, one five-week daily devotional, and one self-help/psychology book.

Quick recaps and thoughts below...

Strangers
(by Belle Burden)

The Big Boo (Patreon Podcast) Book Club pick for May.  Like Lindsay Ferrier, Belle kept good notes throughout her marriage, and she does a great job of articulating her thoughts and emotions surrounding her husband abandoning her and her children, then gaslighting her and playing some petty , emotionally-abusive games in the process of their messy divorce.  She's a solid writer who articulates emotions well, but her mindset reflects some victim thinking and still valuing her ex too highly, so I hope she continues to overcome that and choose strength over smallness or learned helplessness.  *If I decide to push through and get my doctorate, my dissertation will either be on learned helplessness or self-doubt in women, or maybe how they work together, and how we can best overcome them!

Joyful Anyway
(by Kate Bowler)

Very well-written memoir, and the style of book I hope to author soon!  Kate has been through a lot, and she is a deep thinker and a Christian.  (She identifies as an Enneagram 2, but I would have assumed she was a 4.)  This is a collection of stories from her life, including a poignant conversation with a nurse at the hospital that brought me to tears (Kate is a stage 4 cancer survivor, and the nurse was a recent widow and the first person to tell Kate she was sorry for everything she had endured at the hospital - it got deep and real very quickly, and between that account and my memories of Kristen Harriss being stired up recently, it made an impact).  The theme, as you can probably gather from the cover and title, is that although life is really difficult sometimes, we can choose to hold firmly to our God-given joy.  (Having said that, it's the furthest thing from "toxic positivity" or encouraging people to feign happiness while ignoring deeper problems - Kate is not about that nonsense, and neither am I).

Walking With God
(by Beth Moore)

A wonderful devotional book that I listened to a little along over the past few months.  Toward the end, Beth has a chapter on the importance of writing your own story, if only to help you understand and make sense of what God is up to in your life and how He has been with you and for you all along.  It resonated for me and reignited my desire to write (which has felt very muted lately by the knowledge that I won't have a child of my own who might have the desire to learn more about me and read my book someday).  I'm climbing out of the self-pity, though, and realizing that many others might still benefit from what I have to share - myself included.  Beth also shared a chapter where she encourages the reader to interview someone whose walk with God they admire and want to emulate (including some potential questions you might ask them), and I plan to come back to that conversation with several people later!

Theo of Golden
(by Judge Allen Levi)

This book matters more deeply than most fictional stories. Highly recommend!! It is the debut novel by a small-town retired Christian Judge and singer named Allen Levi - fascinating. The story is exceptional, and the audiobook narrator also does a great job! I listened to the last 30 minutes while sitting in my recliner this very morning, then I just sat there and cried for a few minutes - (it's more emotionally/spiritually powerful than it is sad - so good). I bought it on Audible, and I have now ordered a paperback copy signed by the author (because it matters, and I want it on my shelf). It made me think often about Grandad and his tenderheartedness and conversational ability, about the purpose of great art and creativity - even when it goes unappreciated or undervalued, about the value of small acts of kindness, about veterans and homeless people and their untold stories and their desire to be seen and known, about the absurd and senseless damage one angry/violent person can do in a small amount of time, about forgiveness and pausing to really see the faces of the people we tend to dismiss or overlook, about the power of intergenerational friendships to change people... and most importantly, about how to subtly weave the gospel into both my writing and my real life interactions by loving others in a way that connects with and empowers them and inspires curiosity about my faith. Gracious, Judge Levi does an excellent job of weaving in the gospel message in an understated way throughout the book, then more directly toward the end. The one court story he tells was the most powerful chapter for me (chapter 42), and it made so much sense to me to learn that he was a former attorney and small-town Judge. Mostly, he shows the subtle power of living a humble life based on sincere Christian values! ...I hope this one becomes a movie with a solid director who knows what they are doing.

Big Trust
(by Shade Zahrai)

Pivotal for me, and helpful for anyone struggling with self-doubt!  Already wrote more about it HERE. ❤

The Light We Carry
(by Michelle Obama)

Another very well-written memoir!  This was her second book, but I read it first because I appreciated the title and was curious to know more.  It's a collection of stories throughout her life - her close friendships, her Dad's MS, the strong example set by both of her parents, her brother, their childhood, going to Princeton, her marriage, and her experiences with parenting, gardening, racism, personal growth, politics, navigating her public and private roles, going high when others go low, etc.  I would say the first book gives you more day-to-day details on her story, while this follow-up book dives more into how she has grown and all she has learned over the past 50+ years, so it was my favorite of the two!

Becoming
(by Michelle Obama)

Michelle's longer autobiography (a 19-hour audiobook) with more background info on her childhood, dating years, what shaped her values, her college experience, fertility struggles, motherhood, navigating criticism and dehumanization, the political rise of President Obama, her experiences as First Lady, etc.  I always appreciate when people narrate their own books!  (We don't see eye to eye on everything politically or spiritually, but she is a strong woman who commands respect, and this was a well written, vulnerable, and compelling memoir that was good for me to read!)

The Correspondent
(by Virginia Evans)

Also loved this novel from the perspective of a retired older woman who writes letters to various acquaintances, friends, and family members.  The entire book is composed of letters with chronological dates, and you gradually learn the story and the way the characters connect as you move through them.  It's a clever idea that is executed well here, and yet another book that shows the power of intergenerational friendships and small acts of courage and kindness!

Sunrise on the Reaping
(by Suzanne Collins)

The Hunger Games prequel with the story of Haymitch Abernathy competing in the 50th Hunger Games.   Interesting to get an inside look at this character, although parts of this book felt more brutal than the others, which doesn't fully track with the other stories happening years later.  It does give you a clear picture of how he became jaded and where he gets the trauma-based humor and protective strength.  We saw a preview for this movie recently -- (admittedly, all of the Hunger Games movies are set in a bizarre dystopian world) -- and it prompted Mom to say, "WHO would actually wanna go see that!?" lol  I laughed and raised my hand and said, "Meeee!  I'm almost done with the book, and it's been great!" =)

Listening to Joyful Anyway on one of my recent walks.

❤ ❤ ❤

The Storm of Self-Doubt

This book was a timely revelation and practically-helpful tool for me on the topic of self-doubt.  I listened to most of it during my drive home from seeing Annie and Eddie in Texas.  I had talked with Chet earlier that afternoon about how adrift I was feeling without the clear end goal of adoption.  He talked from his perspective about seeing all the doors God had opened for me with CCU, and it was a good (slightly jarring) reminder that it hasn't ALL been roadblocks and hurdles on the counseling journey...

It paired really well with the content of this book, and God used all of the above to inspire hope in me that this may not be the dead end I've been imagining.  Having some time to really think about my story and how much has shifted over the past two years was also helpful.  And in my own defense, there has been A LOT of change and loss to process, and I can see how I got here.  Somewhere between the weight loss surgery and recovery, the extra attention and inner/outer pressure to maintain a certain physical appearance whilst navigating hair loss and hormonal changes that would be difficult for any woman, the intense season of marathon training, trying and struggling to view myself as a "finisher" - someone who commits and finishes what she starts, the end of the master's program, the unexpected difficulty of finding a good counseling job, the hard situations and imposter syndrome in some of those early roles, the desire to bow out and disappear, getting into the PhD program, the high expectation and pressure to perform well while not feeling sure I really want to move forward there, facing the physical realities of aging and fibroids and repeated roadblocks head-on, letting go of my long-held adoption dream, quietly grieving that massive loss with precious little acknowledgement while trying to hold onto other dreams that were kind of rooted in that one, realizing how many of my dreams were tied to the idea of being a mom, pursuing the hope of dating whilst zero men are pursuing me, consistently trying to push back against the sense of feeling rejected/unworthy while also being uninspired by the pool of mediocre/passive men, navigating multiple dating apps and driving to another state for a date and staying open to friend set-ups while knowing there will always be others who believe I'm just not trying hard enough, getting raises and cushier job offers in court reporting while everyone keeps asking how my new counseling career is going, ambiguous grief and feeling unheard in certain family situations, and navigating a major friendship conflict and sharply critical/painful conversations there... it has all spiraled me into fairly crippling inner storm of shame and self-doubt, with an amped-up desire to numb out from the gnawing sense that nothing I do is ever quite enough.

Woof.  This book really opened my eyes to all of that, and now I believe God will help me rebuild my sense of identity and God-given power and authority!  I've always loved the verses that talk about Jesus teaching "with real authority, quite unlike their teachers of religious law."  I love and have always been drawn to people who speak with authority, who believe in themselves, lead well, and exude a genuine security and confidence that puts others at ease.  God is opening a few new doors, and I have some ideas brewing on what I want to pursue.  Whatever else I do with the remainder of my life, I know I want to pursue and live from that inner trust and confidence that is rooted in Christ!!

Big Trust Quotes:

• "You're not questioning just your skills or knowledge, but yourself.  Your value, your place, your right to take up space.  You doubt your very sense of who you are, and that's why self-doubt sticks.  Because we mistake it for who we are rather than something we've learned or internalized.
• Your brain's response to feeling not enough is often to overcompensate.  You tell yourself that the next achievement, promotion, or milestone will be the one, the moment you finally feel like you belong.  But the finish line keeps moving.  You take on more, chase perfection, and tie your worth to your output.  No matter how much you achieve, you still end the day thinking: Was it enough?
• The more visible you become, the more pressure you imagine is on you.  More eyes, more expectations, more chances to disappoint.  So you procrastinate, you hesitate, and you convince yourself you're fine where you are.  But you're not; you're just scared...  Safety feels better than growth, but staying small isn't safe.  It's self-sabotage.
• These patterns (overworking, people-pleasing, shrinking, or finding comfort in others' failures) all stem from the same belief: I'm not enough.  Every behavior is an attempt to avoid that discomfort, but until you face it head-on and call it out for the lie it is, you'll stay stuck.
• There will always be others who seem better equipped, more qualified, sharper, shinier, something.  The real difference between people who do the hard things and the ones who don't isn't talent, and it isn't usually skill.  It's BELIEF.  It's the ability to come back to an unshakable trust in your own unique individual strengths even when self-doubt is doing its best to derail you.
• Most of us are far more competent, stronger, wiser, and more capable than we give ourselves credit for. You don't need to pretend you know it all.  Trust the part of you that's always been willing to learn and brave enough to ask.  When you trust your skills and your ability to figure things out, challenges don't feel insurmountable.  When you connect to your inner authority, self-doubt quiets and self-trust begins to take its place.
• Self-trust grows faster in good company.  Surround yourself with people who believe in you, even when you don't.  These are the folks who hold you accountable, cheer you on, and remind you of who you are when doubt gets loud... one supportive person can make a world of difference! #truestory
• Don't just do this for you.  Be the leader who uplifts others, the parent who inspires, the friend who brings light, the human who makes the world better just by being more of who they are.  That's what big trust unlocks - not just inner trust, but outer impact!
• No matter where you are in life, YOUR FUTURE IS STILL YOURS TO SHAPE!  ...Self-trust isn't built in one grand moment.  It's built in every small moment where you decide:  I'm not shrinking.  I'm not hiding.  I'm not doubting - not this time.  Now, go re-write your story!"

God is with me.

God is for me.

He renews my strength 

and guides my steps,
and He will complete the good things

HE has started.

❤ ❤ ❤

First Quarter Books

I've listened to eight audiobooks thus far - a solid first quarter of 2026!

(HP full cast book 2 and 3 not pictured.)

Quick recaps/thoughts below...

Awake
(by Jen Hatmaker)

Better than expected.  A timely book about rebuilding your life when some things you've deeply counted on end or fall apart.  This memoir was divided into three sections, beginning with "The End" of her marriage, moving into "The Middle" with messy rebuilding, and finally "The Beginning," where she was growing and embracing the new story - I loved that structure!  Also loved her story about building a big backyard table and learning to cook and intentionally filling her home and feeding her people.  Promptly ordered her cookbook after reading that part.  Her theology is obviously a bit off-base, but this is more of a memoir than a self-help or instructional book, and there are good things to be taken from it.  She's feisty and funny and a strong writer and lovable person!

Anne of Green Gables
(by Lucy Maud Montgomery)

Familiar, fantastic, and heartwarming - and I love that Rachel McAdams reads this one!

Harry Potter Full Cast Audiobooks #1, 2, and 3
(by J.K. Rowling)

Strengthening and light and fun!  Ironically, I still prefer the Jim Dale version to the full-cast audio.  (They made very little effort to cast people who sound similar to the movie characters, and it bothers me.)

Strong Ground
(by Brene Brown)

“Transformation is about building, and it must start with dismantling. The process is deeply personal, disorienting, and almost always involves going backward before speeding forward. We must be willing to confront the off-limits stuff, intentionally and strategically breaking old systems that no longer serve us while fiercely protecting a strong, mission-grounded foundation… I always thought the Phoenix rising was the transformation and the fire was something we had to survive, but I was wrong. The fire is the transformation!” ~Brené Brown (condensed & paraphrased - I loved that chapter!)

Enough
(by Oprah Winfrey and Ania Jastreboff)

This book explains the biology of obesity, the way our brains and bodies work together to maintain a "set point" weight range, making sure that we have "enough" calories/energy by increasing hunger and slowing metabolism whenever our weight drops... driving weight back toward the ingrained "enough point."  They compared this to a thermostat that constantly adjusts to defend the set temperature… so for people with obesity, the rough reality is when you work hard to lose weight, your metabolism slows down and your hunger hormones are activated, naturally pushing your weight back up over time.  Special.  Because modern environments are stressful and full of highly-palatable food, many people experience persistent food noise, meaning constant thoughts about eating + food cravings that make it harder to stick with diets.  That's all I have known, but not everyone thinks that way - some people live free from that preoccupation, and it's those mindset factors that comprise obesity being a disease or diagnosis, and that all makes sense and truly resonates for me.  They explain in scientific detail how GLP-1 medications turn down these internal thermostat settings, working with our biology by mimicking natural gut hormones that signal fullness, quieting the internal food noise, and reducing appetite/cravings, all by lowering our body’s defended weight range so that it works *with us* on our health goals rather than pushing back and resisting weight loss!  Sign. me. up.  (Currently in my first month on Zepbound - more on that later).

The Coddling of the American Mind
(by Greg Lukianoff and Jonathan Haidt)

This book was a gem (recommended by Jonathan T. from CCU).  About intent versus perception, the  unintentional damage caused by our cultural emphasis on safety, and how to rebuild resilience and raise strong children!

Final Books for 2025!

1.  SPSS Survival Manual: A Step by Step Guide to Data Analysis Using IBM SPSS by Julie Pallant -- My statistics textbook - riveting, as you might imagine!  But I learned some new things, and I'm officially done with math courses forevermore at the end of this week -- HUZZAH!!

2.  How to Do the Work: Recognize Your Patterns, Heal from Your Past, and Create Your Self by Nicole LePera -- Read this three years ago and revisited it recently based on Emily's recommendation since it has some great content on calming and resetting your nervous system! ❤

3.  It Doesn't Have to Hurt: Your Smart Guide to a Pain-Free Life by Dr. Sanjay Gupta -- He was on Mel's podcast, and he is good at explaining medical things on a relatable layperson level.  This book has great evidence-based insight on how our mindset affects our pain tolerance and experience of physical pain.

4.  Keep Sharp: Build a Better Brain at Any Age by Dr. Sanjay Gupta -- Again, strong medical content that feels accessible for the average reader... with relevant lifestyle changes and medical tests that would be helpful for anyone dealing with cognitive decline or hoping to prevent it.

5.  Collective Illusions: Conformity, Complicity, and the Science of Why We Make Bad Decisions by Todd Rose -- my favorite book of 2025, found through Mel Robbins' podcast!!  The author researched how our false assumptions about the majority opinion quietly shape our decisions and our culture.  He argues that most of us hide our preferences and conform in an effort to belong, chasing goals we do not really value and reinforcing systems most people do not believe in.  This drives political polarization and personal dissatisfaction, not to mention the issues it creates within the church... and this book is a roadmap for questioning the perceived norms, speaking honestly about our true values, and building healthier environments where AUTHENTICITY replaces conformity!

6.  The Lion and the Bear: A 100-Day Guide for Facing Your Giants by Caroline Shankle -- A solid devotional book intended for teens and college girls... I was excited to support Caroline's first book (Melanie's daughter from the Big Boo Podcast), and I wanted to listen to it before giving it to my niece as a bonus Christmas gift! =)

7.  That's a Great Question, I'd Love to Tell You by Elyse Myers -- Another first-book effort I was happy to support!  I always enjoy Elyse's reels and the way she shares her personal stories with vulnerability and humor, and this book was sweet and fun.  I appreciate the stream-of-consciousness-style storytelling, and it was nice to learn more about how she and Jonas (her husband) first met.

8.  Hiring for Attitude: A Revolutionary Approach to Recruiting Star Performers.. by Mark Murphy -- Did not love this one - maybe because it felt outdated and a little condescending, or maybe because the author used the phrase "brown shorts" approximately 100,000 times when I'd have preferred "workplace culture" or "company values."  I understand the general message of "prioritize hiring people who share your core values," but I did not love the way it was delivered.

9.  Great by Choice: Uncertainty, Chaos, and Luck - Why Some Thrive Despite Them All by Jim Collins -- Loved this one, found through Craig's Leadership podcast.  Another research-driven book (yay for thinking ahead on dissertation ideas) where they compared the performance of several top companies and analyzed the main qualities that led to 10x greatness: fanatic discipline, evidence-based creativity, and productive paranoia.

So that officially wraps up my reading list for 2025.  The 40 books pictured below + my annual re-read of Atomic Habits, for a total of 41 books at age 41 - YAY!  A happy accident this year, but one I will be intentional about continuing!! =)

Seven of this year's books were re-reads from past years,
but of the books that were new to me:

Gold = Collective Illusions

Silver = I've Never Been Here Before

Bronze = Here Be Dragons

❤ ❤ ❤