Septembers I Remember

As a past-oriented Ennegram 9 (something interesting I learned about in Suzanne's book this month), I like to look for patterns.  

In spite of my genuine love for football season, Fair food, and Fall fun with friends and family, September has historically been a bit of a sad month for me...

2001 – My Senior year at CHA, crystalized memories of watching the national news in Mrs. Young’s office on September 11th

2002 – Trying to find my footing as a new college student at OBU; unsure of my major and not loving the bug-filled dorm room; very much missing my family and CHA friends

2010 – Frustrated with single life and shifting relationships; wrote my first blog post contemplating single motherhood (15th)

2012 – Struggling through a difficult Statistics class at SNU-Tulsa

2013 – Got my printed SNU diploma the same day Malori confirmed our friendship was over (9-6); Lots of grief over that ending + lots of time with newborn Kyndal Faith

2014 – Came off of the antidepressant medication; Walked out of a crazy “prayer ministry” cult (9-19)

2015 – Received a maddening rejection email from SNU’s master’s degree program (reason still unknown) on the day of Sarah’s monkey bread fiasco (9-25)

2016 – Gradually reconnected with a newly-married friend after not speaking for seven months

2019 – Handwriting thank-you notes with Mom after Grandad’s funeral

2020 – Malori announced her family was moving back to OKC, which ironically meant increasing tension and disconnection in our friendship

2021 – Car wreck in Ruby Claire just before my first home study with Shay at 522; (also finished my first adoption profile book)

2022 – Touring my nearly-complete new construction Taber home; lab work and IUI appointments at OU Reproductive; processing some negative pregnancy tests on my own

2023 – Adjusting to the busier schedule with my internship at Restore; Babah’s rapid decline, hospice, death, and memorial service

(The FB memory that got me thinking about this pattern today.  I so love these pics of the Wilson fam!)

2024 – A jarring, friendship-altering conversation on the 3rd; my video interview for a CCU professor job (never heard back); the death of Maggie Smith

2025 – More vulnerable and emotionally-painful Dallas IVF appointments; feeling overwhelmed and under-motivated in multiple areas of life; paused my candidacy hours; briefly researched surrogacy; finally closed the embryo adoption chapter

Even in my current state of mild exhaustion, I feel deeply aware that God's grace has been consistent in every melancholy element and painful season of my life, and I'm grateful He has blessed me with dependable friends and family!

I'm also very grateful that we get to start fresh with a new month tomorrow!!

❤ ❤ ❤